Founded in 1997 in reaction to the sale of the SCMP by Rupert Murdoch to Peking-friendly billionaire Robert Kuok, in exchange for satellite broadcasting rights in Mainland China, NOT The South China Morning Post is Hong Kong's first and foremost online English publication and is committed to press freedom. Proud to be electronic but never a mere blog.

" I think of Dr. George Adams and "NOT the South China Morning Post" as kin to the lone Chinese who challenged the column of tanks at Tiananmen Square in June of 1989." - Editor and Publisher Magazine, "Bible" of the Publishing World

" One of the top fifty names on the international Web." - Online Journalism Review

PODCASTS in glorious low bitrate MP3: NTSCMP v Hemlock Podcast 1 : Part 1 / Part 2, Podcast Two and Podcast 3 (a review of Hong Kong 2006). Listen also to Joe McGinniss, distinguished USA investigative author currently preparing a book on the Kissel family tragedies.

FREE HONG KONG BOOKS : Games Hong Kong People Play / The Great Hong Kong Sex Novel

Mario del Monaco was the greatest tenor of the 20th century! Listen to him sing this famous Bizet aria.

MUSIC OF THE MONTH : Korngold's Cello Concerto in C Major at last on YouTube!! The short work has a searing central section where Korngold quotes not so much from Deception (1946), the film which inspired the piece, but from what is for me one of the greatest of all Hollywood films and all film scores (Korngold himself thought it his best): Between Two Worlds (1944). Fifty years after his death in obscurity and exile, the great Austrian composer's works are almost all now committed to disc and in 2009 his finest opera Die Tote Stadt is to be given its British premiere at Covent Garden.

(For Kathy) - The Second Movement of Korngold's Violin Concerto... and the Love Duet from the First Act of Korngold's Die Kathrin....and for me: Richard Strauss's Morgen, the closing scene of Wagner's Parsifal and the central adagio excerpt from Korngold's Piano Concerto For The Left Hand.

ALWAYS NEWSWORTHY : THE POST'S OWNER IS THE MAIN CAUSE OF THE ORANGUTAN'S EXTINCTION AND HIS BIOFUELS ARE BRINGING POVERTY TO MILLIONS...

WATCH A REVEALING VIDEO ABOUT BIODIESEL AND THE DESTRUCTION OF BORNEO.

READ A RECENT NEW YORK TIMES ARTICLE ABOUT BIOFUELS AND FOOD PRICES.

"SIR" DAVID TANG PETITION

"We the undersigned object to the recent knighthood of the rich Hong Kong tailor David Tang and call on the British Government to quash this title, awarded for no good reason to this fatuous vainglorious socialite and jetsetting media bore."

SIGN THE ONLINE PETITION NOW !

CATHAY OWNERS REDUCE ROUTES

Sir Adrian Swire

1. Trout stream : easier to get to now we have the new Range Rover.

2. The Cashpoint machine : no need to go there as we have pots of money already.

3. The peerage : must be one available for good sorts like us.

(That's enough route cuts. Ed.)

FACE WHITENER OF THE MONTH

Enid Fenby writes: " I was quite struck by this latest poster for our beloved local politician and ex-Gauleiterin Geena Hip (who used to be known as Regina Ip before the makeover). Such white skin, such a delicate bloom, unlike those ugly brown-faced Oberleutnants beside her. What's wrong with brown or yellow skin? It certainly suits her brown and yellow politics."

WHO CAN PREDICT AN EARTHQUAKE ?

Seismologists can, within reason. Then it depends on the Government whether it takes the necessary action. All schools and public buildings in an earthquake zone ought to be built with the risks in mind. The Chinese Government's attitude to ethnic minorities is notoriously savage and to Tibetan minorities like those in the Sichuan disaster zone, savage is not quite the word to use. Let us cast our minds back to 1976 and the Tangshan earthquake:

Many people in Tangshan reported seeing strange lights (the so-called earthquake light) the night before the earthquake. Well water in a village outside of Tangshan reportedly rose and fell three times the day before the earthquake. Gas began to spout out of a well in another village on July 12 and then increased on July 25 and July 26. More than half a month before the earthquake struck, Wang Chengmin of the State Seismological Bureau (SSB) Analysis and Prediction Department had already concluded that the Tangshan region would be struck by a significant earthquake between July 22, 1976 to August 5, 1976. Abnormal signals were mentioned for Beijing, Tianjin, Tangshan, Bohai and Zhangjiakou regions. Wang made an effort to publicize the information to 60 people. One of the people listening in was Qinglong official Wang Qingchun. After voicing the concerns to Wang Qingchun, his county took the report very seriously. Up to 800 members of his county tried to respond Between July 25-26, 1976 each community of Qinglong country had emergency meetings to prepare and instruct villagers. Buildings were examined and water reservoirs were given special attention. The county secretary in charge, Ran Guangqi decided to risk his political career and certain jail term to prepare the 470,000 residents of the county for the upcoming earthquake by ordering officials to educate the people as well as evacuate the local population to safer areas. Decades later the United Nations in 1995 concluded that the early warnings paid off, and that public administrators, scientists and citizens working together increased the survival rate. There was a huge difference between a prepared versus an unprepared county. Some sources showed that the county was prepared as much as two years in advance.

With earthquakes, as with many other natural hazards, where there is a will there may be a way. Did the Chinese Communist Party and the State Seismological Bureau have it? Probably not.

TANG BRIDGES THE GAP

ENVIRONMENT WATCH

SCMP UNSUBBED

EVEN REDDER FACES AT XINHUA

GEORGE SMILEY writes: "Anyone who believes the story put about by Ambrose Lau concerning the leak of information from the Immigration Department clearly needs to know about the extent of CCP spy infiltration in our dear former colony. Here's the likely scenario. One of the Chinese Communist Party's many moles at the Immigration Department is instructed to check the veracity and/or update the list of potential troublemakers at the all-important Olympic Torch parade, a list already supplied of course to Peking by our supine Government. He is, like many of the newer moles, a complete disaster and keeps the list on the same computer as his porn-downloading device at home. The inevitable happens and the watch list is found by our spooks via Echelon who dutifully inform the Hong Kong Government. Fearing a real scandal, Ambrose cooks up the present story of a recent recruit inadvertently releasing the information whilst he is innocently perusing files at home. The friendly Hong Kong press disseminates the phony story as they always do. They are better at doing that than any Foxy software."

TYCOONS DEMAND MINIMUM WAGE

LI EXPLAINS COMPETITION LAW

"Take that troublemaker George Adams in Stanley. If he wanted a different Internet or fixed telephone line provider, all he has to do is to move down the road into one of those tower blocks we built. He could generate his own electricity or move to Kowloon. There's also Wellcome supermarket. Admittedly it's one tenth the size of Park 'N' Shop but all the basics are there. We never fix the prices with Dairy Farm - if anyone's watching. He never had it so good."

RTHK BALLS

Congratulations to senior RTHK broadcaster Hugh Chiverton for confusing hand, foot and mouth disease- which largely affects children - and foot and mouth disease which largely affects, er, cattle. It's in the second half of the Backchat programme (which was actually quite good otherwise) on the 5th May 2008. The first half was all about politics and Hugh was clearly getting tired by then, poor love.

Download this golden Chiverton moment (37 seconds/MP3).

DAB VOLKSFRONT

The strategy of the Democratic Alliance for the Betterment and Progress of Hong Kong (sic), Hong Kong's front for the Chinese Communist Party, seems simple: grab a pensioner (yes, he was but a bad photo sometimes takes years off you) with time on his hands, slip him a few hundred and get him onto the streets of godforsaken areas like Shau Kei Wan to sign up people for the electoral roll, particularly those who possibly can't write, who look feeble or benighted and thus look easy fodder for the DAB's improbable electoral programme. The cheerful little man does the form-filling for you and keeps the form to post later. Questions pose themselves however. As this is clearly electioneering, is the outlay of these campaigns put down as "election expenses"? Is it correct that the cheerful man keeps the form, thus enabling him to enter all your personal information into a computer? Is it even legal for him to fill out the form for you in the first place?

HOOKER OF THE WEEK

This week : "Old Lee"

Like a bit of rough and can't find a taxi rank? Old Lee is available for massage and more. Hong Kong certainly has all bases covered in the service industry.

GAMES GUNGHO !

The arrest "for her own protection" of Christina Chan (in paddy wagon above) poses interesting issues for the law on police powers which have clearly been abused here. Let us hope that Ms Chan sues the police for wrongful arrest and illegal detention.

"This was a defining moment for Hong Kong. More than any event since the city's return to China 11 years ago, the relay dispelled lingering doubts about the patriotism of our people. But it also helped confirm Hong Kong's status as a liberal part of China where views of all kinds can be aired.

"Some activists were regrettably refused entry to Hong Kong ahead of the relay. But other protesters supporting Tibet or calling for human rights improvements on the mainland were able to demonstrate along the route yesterday. There was not a single arrest. The only sour note was the police's heavy-handed way of "protecting" some demonstrators by removing them."

(New China Morning Post)

FARROW WHISKED THROUGH

EXPAT OF THE WEEK

A great tinkler of the ivories but one dreadful pseud. He also combines Roman Catholicism with being a confirmed bachelor and he isn't even a defrocked priest. Be seated please for Stephen Hough, visiting Hong Kong at the end of May to play for the masses, hopefully not to perform one of his own turgid compostions. Here's a sample of Houghspeak: "I like the idea of someone reading just one phrase in the morning,' he says.'For example,"My cry reached his ears" from Psalm 18. It's a line you can fish out from your memory during a sweaty Tube journey or a difficult meeting. It means that even your slightest anxiety is known to God, and that's a tremendous consolation." Listen to the apparently brain-dead but mellifluous civil-servant-on-a-lucrative-pre-1997-special-contract-with-lots-of-leave-thank-you Jonathan "Art Titbit" Douglas of RTHK Radio 4 ask Hough the sort of innocuous and mindless questions we used to accuse David Frost of asking. One feels Hough and Douglas have such a lot in common...

THE INEXTINGUISHABLE

The truth about the Fritzl case in the small town in Austria where residents are immune to horrors on their doorstep (just as they were immune to the horrors of the concentration camps close by during the war, obliviousness seems to be an Austrian tradition) is that it is a tale of heroism in the face of adversity and the tenacity of the human spirit. It would have been impossible for Elisabeth and her children to survive in such circumstances unless they were united by bonds of deep love and devotion to each other. Certain things about humanity are indeed inextinguishable. Quiet reflection on this case would be a better thing for people to do with their time than watching a propaganda parade with a phoney flame this Friday.

The finale to Carl Nielsen's Symphony No. 4: "The Inextinguishable" on YouTube.

STANDARD OF PROOF

Travelling on the bus from Stanley into town to see the Kissel appeal, I pick up yet another discarded copy of the Hong Kong Standard from the floor of the upper deck. Wow. They are really going places and now have more readers than the New China Morning Post, according to objective facts presented in the slightly soiled pages I read.. Perhaps the fact that you don't have to buy it has something to do with it. How can the circulation of a free newspaper be compared to something people have to buy in any objective and meaningful sense? The figures behind the claim are based on the assumption that there are lots of bored people on buses looking for things to read, obviously. The Standard is not the only paper which fiddles its circulation figures but it is the only one where the main culprit, Sally Aw, did not go to jail on the grounds of diminished responsibility (surely her best defence, like Mrs Kissel) but because she knew the right people. As the Standard is now owned by a respectable tobacco baron who has successfully infiltrated the Government to sell his cheap fags here and on the Mainland, things must have changed. Are the auditors all chain smokers? And do they pay for their cigarettes?

BO YANG 1920-2008

(DEAD) EXPAT OF THE WEEK

A Filipino bartender at the Fenwick at the Dock nightclub in Lockhart Road, Wan Chai, said she saw Cherry with an expatriate man in the bar at about 1am on the same day. At 3.55am, Cherry was also seen inside the Show Biz Nightclub on the same street with an expatriate man. Nightclub owner Lau Yin said Cherry had asked to take a Filipino dancer, Michelle Callejas, out for a meal and the pair had left with the dancer after he settled an HK$8,506 bill. Cherry returned alone to Fenwick at the Dock between 5am and 6am, asking to take the Filipino bartender and her friend to breakfast at The Bridge, a nearby bar. The bartender, who left work at 7am, said they declined but her friend saw Cherry alone at The Bridge. Cherry made his last call, to his secretary Helen Lee, at 8am asking for her to deliver HK$10,000 cash to the hotel and cancelling an afternoon meeting, Ms Lee said. She dropped off the cash to the front desk in a sealed envelope at 9am. A hotel staff member slid the envelope under the door to Cherry's room at 10.15am, the court heard. Mr Li said he saw no envelope near the doorway when he found the dead pair at about 3pm after he entered with a master key when repeated knocks went unanswered. The court will hear a two-hour video interview with Michelle Callejas, 20, who had been subpoenaed for the inquest. The coroner's officer said the dancer had already left the city and police had no jurisdiction to enforce the subpoena. The inquest continues today.

(SCMP)

NTSCMP T-SHIRT OFFER

Dear Dr Adams: "On behalf of the SM community in Hong Kong, I am happy to be able to offer NTSCMP's masochistic readers (aren't they all?) a commemorative T-shirt design for wear at the Olympic torch relay. This design is very special, as it is guaranteed to ensure the wearer a good kicking from supporters on both sides of the Tibet vs China dispute. Pete."

CHAMBERS NEWS

OUT AND ABOUT

Dr. Adams,
 
Thought you would appreciate 1. a slug of "orthodox coconut juice", ordered in a restaurant up in  Shekou before the crackdown on visas made it difficult to get up there for such fun.
 
And 2. wandering in Log On last week, I saw this bizzare bra-drying device...surely this started out a a 'chindogu', a humorously useless Japanese invention (q.v.); and then someone saw marketing possibilities in Hong Kong. Seems there are no sizes to this thing. Ahem.
 
Also, your map for choice protesting sites on 2 May needs to be updated. Oy read in th'Post where they have eeliminated Hong Kong Park from the route, probably because it would have been too difficult for the television cameras to shoot the run without catching somebody waving a Tibetan flag up the hillside.
 
Bayonets for Lhasa, indeed.
 
DFU

THE BEST JOKES ARE IN THE STANDARD

DESPERATE BARRISTERS

Defence barrister Andrew Bruce SC told the court that Choy had entered a room through a half-open door. The theft was extraordinary, he said, since Choy took items from different places in the room - including inside the pocket of an overcoat - but did not take an obviously valuable laptop computer. Choy had intended to return the property but found the room door was closed, he said. Mr Bruce told the court that Choy was under great stress on the day of the theft. He was upset when a client failed to appear for a meeting, since Choy was expecting to collect a payment for his company.

(SCMP)

HOOKER OF THE WEEK

This Week : "Fetish AV Queen", Mong Kok

FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES

Thug (or even goon) political organisations all over the world, and throughout history, have a "hooligan element" arm which they call in when the going gets rough. In Hong Kong this takes the form of mysterious triad-related "patriotic" nationalists suddenly popping up to terrorise politicians and journalists who get out of line. In Mainland China it sometimes takes the form of "spontaneous" demonstrations by "outraged nationalists". Watch the hysteria against Carrefour grow and the Chinese Communist Party tut-tutting and wringing their hands at the sidelines. In Realpolitik, it is not so much friends in high places that count. It is the friends you have in low places.

SOLIDARITY WITH MUGABE

THE GUARDIAN REPORTS: " Despite international criticism, the Chinese government has been a longstanding backer of Zimbabwe president Robert Mugabe's authoritarian regime, supplying it with jet fighters, military vehicles and guns. China, or Chinese businesses, are reported to have sold radio-jamming devices to prevent independent stations from contradicting the state-controlled media, and have signed vital agriculture deals. Even the blue tiles on Mugabe's latest 25-bedroom mansion, reminiscent of Beijing's Forbidden City, were a gift from China."

More.

LOOKALIKE

Enid Fenby, SC writes: "Despite ther difference in years, I couldn't help noticing a strong superficial resemblance between "Black Widow" drugger and murderer-for-insurance Helen Golay and our own wronged milkshake dispenser Nancy Keeshin Kissel. This evidence must be inadmissable."

GAMES GUNGHO !

Standard's disgraceful slanting of the issue.

The Hong Kong Standard, Hong Kong's answer to the Surbiton Free Advertiser, adduces a survey held by the Chinese University to show that Hong Kong people are often supportive of the idea of protests against China's occupation of Tibet. The Standard however uses the survey to whip up foreigner bashing. None of the conclusions of the survey can possibly support its offensive and misleading headline. Buried on page 8 is another misleading report - actually the main story of the morning: the way the tobacco industry is imbedded into the Government, which has resulted in cheap cigarettes for all in Hong Kong. The Standard's owner is of course tobacco mogul Charles Ho. It is a sad day when we have to to go the SCMP for a less biased and self-censored report of events.

HOOKER OF THE WEEK

This week : "Magic Bed and Instant DVD", Mong Kok.

DESPERATE BARRISTERS

(SCMP)

A BETTER OLYMPIC TORCH GAME

Enid Fenby writes: "The Government has been hard at work licking up to Peking over the Olympics and has even designed a pathetic online game for this purpose. It is nice to see that there is an alternative game available, complete with protesters, policemen and fire extinguishers."

NEW UNITY OF PURPOSE

HK PEOPLE ORDERED TO "STAY AT HOME"

Hong Kong streets will be cleared for the passage of the Olympic Torch on May 2nd. This came in an emergency Order In Counsel from the beleaguered Governor Tsang on Saturday. " May 2nd is a Friday and people would love to be at home and out of the rain. They aren't really interested in this Olympic business anyway and would rather be playing mahjong or watching the telly, " a government spokesman said. "As for those foreign layabouts, we can spot them a mile away. They'll be ordered down to Stanley to shop for oversized T-shirts and polyester silk pyjamas like sensible tourists." Tsang Tak-sing is 98.

BUSH SHORTENS IRAQ ARMY TOURS

EDUCATION "ON A ROLL"

MORE PASSENGERS COME OUT

AVIATION NEWS

VICE CABBIES NEW SHOCK

More.

OUT AND ABOUT

D. U. writes: "Seen in Shenzhen...finally, truth in PRC advertising."

TORCH TO FOLLOW SUBTERRANEAN ROUTE

Above: French miners await the torch.

After a series of protests in Britain and France, the Olympic Committee has announced that the Olympic Torch will now be transported underground. It will enter its first coal shaft just outside Paris and continue to Switzerland by the Mont Blanc tunnel, entering the Gotthard on Thursday. It will then be sent along the Russian gas pipelines as soon as they are rendered safe and the flame will emerge in Siberia in 2020. " We are grateful to the Hong Kong Government for their planning in this regard," a spokesman said.

POLITICAL EVENTS

Enid Fenby writes: " Did you hear that that other Tien brother Michael (the one who ran the miniature railway) is joining James in his "Let's Play At Politics" club? Do you have a photograph in your vast archives of these two boy wonders? Their mother must be so proud."

HK FESTIVAL DIARY

LOOKALIKE

Brenda Ferret writes: "I am sure I am not the first to notice the stunning similarity between Italian American character actor Stanley Tucci and local children's author Nury Vittachi? Have they ever been seen together at the same hair clinic?"

THOSE 20 DIANA INQUEST ISSUES IN FULL

1. She snuffed it. Is anyone still interested except Dodi's Dad?

2. Er...

3. That's it.

A new feature dedicated to Central Government propaganda masquerading as news items in the compliant local media.

GAMES GUNG-HO

(Hong Kong Standard, 1st April 2008)

NETVIGATOR REWARDS

After thirteen years as a Netvigator subscriber, I receive yet another e-mail telling me of the rewards which await me for such blind loyalty. I now have 3067 Netcash points. I reflect on how much I deserve something after having my service hijacked, sabotaged, meddled with and thwarted. Then I think of all the time I have spent listening to mindless jingles on the so-called Customer Service hotlines. I recall the brain-numbing idiocy of the PCCW engineers I have talked to, the long waits for them to arrive in my flat to litter my home with bits of copper wire, if they arrived at all. Then I reflect on the way PCCW's i-Pass has ripped me off on my trips abroad. Lo and behold the munificence of Mr Li's family for such customer fidelity. I spend hours deciding between the contact lens case and the key ring.

DITH PRAN 1942-2008

"THE SHINING" REMADE IN HONG KONG

CHINA : THE RACIST OLYMPIAN

Dr Adams,

I draw your attention to the Olympic Charter, Page 11 item 5. 

In November last year, the issue came up in the media of equestrian hopeful Jennifer Lee Ming-hua (no relation), who was born in the US and qualified to represent Hong Kong, but I cannot find any reference to this in the local or international media since then.

This excerpt from Asia Sentinal sums up the issue: "Until recently, qualification to represent Hong Kong at the Olympics was determined by length of residence, in keeping with the territory's dependent status and the multi-ethnic origins of a significant part of its population. But now the Hong Kong government, perhaps abetted by Beijing, is changing the rules in a move that borders on outright racism. Although qualification by length of residence remains the case with other dependent territories, such as Bermuda, it is being made a condition of joining a Hong Kong Olympic team that individuals have a Hong Kong Special Administrative Region passport, which requires that the person be of Chinese nationality. This is contrary to practice across the whole Olympic movement" 

I would be grateful if through your august and widely read organ you could raise further awareness of this insidious policy.

A Reader.

RTHK BALLS

The index actually went up. "Rebounds" is the word RTHK normally uses when the index goes up after a drop. Incidentally, it uses "surges", "rallies" and "rebounds" when there is often just a small rise in the index. It never uses parallel words like "sinks" or " crashes" when there are corresponding sharp or dramatic drops, choosing instead to reflect on a "general trend in Asia" "on the back of overnight falls on Wall Street" and so on. The RTHK news room is certainly "house-trained" in this respect.

MEET MISS SURREY

Chloe Marshall, from Guildford, admits to being 79.8 kilograms, is 1.78 metres tall and has a 38DD bust. She won her local heat in Surrey and is on her way to the Miss England contest. She is reported to be "the average size for a British woman".

CULTURE NEWS

Beijing 2008 Olympic Torch Relay in Hong Kong
On April 30 the Olympic Flame will arrive in Hong Kong, the first stop on Chinese soil. Oh yes. There will be no demonstrations by anyone as special police vans will be on hand to deal with any trouble, parked round the corner, pretending to be watching jewellers' shops. A total of 120 torchbearers wearing oxygen masks and running slowly will take part in the Olympic Torch Relay in Hong Kong and carry the Olympic Flame to major landmarks and scenic spots in the territory on May 2, if any can be located.

Hong Kong Flower Show 2008
Official kowtowing and gung-hoism continues with "Vibrant Blossoms for Beijing Olympics" as the theme and "Gerbera" as the theme flower at the Hong Kong Flower Show 2008 which will showcase a rich profusion of exquisite flowers, beautiful floral arrangements and gorgeous landscape displays. Oh yes. Other fringe activities will also be organised during the show period but we are keeping those quiet to thwart demonstrations by the Falun Gong.
Date: 14/3/2008 – 24/3/2008
Venue: Victoria Park

Bun Carnival 2008
Bun Carnival 2008 (note official Hong Kong non-use of the definite article) will be staged at the soccer pitch of Pak Tai Temple Playground, Cheung Chau between April 26 and May 13 following special payoffs to the local triads. The Bun Scrambling Competition is open for application from March 14 but it is all sown up so don't bother. There will be a Climbing Carnival on May 4 for members of the public to enjoy the fun of bun tower climbing, whatever that is. Activities such as games stalls, handicraft demonstrations, variety show and climbing demonstrations will be staged.

Free use of LCSD's leisure facilities to support Olympics
The Free Admission Scheme of LCSD Leisure Facilities will be carried out to enable members of the public to use most of LCSD's leisure facilities free of charge from July 1 to September 30. This is to create the illusion of public interest in the Peking Olympics. During the period, the public can enjoy facilities including holiday camps, water sports centres, tennis courts, sports centres and public swimming pools free of charge in sessions that have not been grabbed already by "groups". Dumping in pools and gobbing in the changing rooms will be actively discouraged at this time. Bookings for July holiday camp facilities and the day and tent camps at Chong Hing Water Sports Centre can now be made. Arrangements for the free use of other LCSD leisure facilities will be announced later when we have sized up the numbers.

Pre-festival Competitions of the 7th Hong Kong Literature Festival
The 7th Hong Kong Literature Festival will be held in June. To whip up support for this non-event, three predictable and unimaginative pre-festival competitions have been organised: the Charm of Hong Kong Neighbourhood Writing Competition, Picturesque Words: Photographs Titling Competition and a Literary Performance Competition for Students are now open for applications. Nury Vittachi and Peter Gordon need not apply.

More details soon on RTHK Radio 3 Backchat !!!

THE GRIM SUCCESS OF THE BUSH YEARS

As the Bush presidency reaches its end with universal consensus over its supposed failures, let us pause to consider that in just eight years the ignoramus from Texas has really produced for the people who actually run the world: food and oil prices are at record highs and military spending is firmly back in the Good Old Days. Think twice before you castigate Mr Bush. On his own agenda, he is beyond question the greatest thing since Stalin for keeping power in the hands of the good old boys.

ARRESTS IN ANDREW KISSEL CASE

A few weeks before the appeal of Nancy Kissel is to be heard on April 14th in Hong Kong, the suspected murderers of Robert Kissel's brother, one of them his chauffeur, have been arrested in the USA. An interesting detail is the involvement of the Drug Enforcement Administration in one of the arrests.

FUNNY OLD ENGLAND

ENCOURAGER LES AUTRES

(RTHK)

BUDGET BONANZA

LOOKALIKE

Brenda Kuok writes: "I am sure I am not the first to notice the staggering resemblance between " everything but the laughter" humourist Nury Vittachi and Mini Me from the Austin Powers James Bond spoofs. In his constant self-satire as wannabe popular novelist and faux Asian guerilla journalist, has Vittachi at last discovered a sense of humour? Let's hope so."

KWEER KUOK KLAN UPDATE

The intrepid David Webb reports :

CNOOC Burma partner owned by "heroin trafficker" family
26th February 2008

An alert reader draws our attention to this announcement by the United States Treasury, and this statement by President Bush, imposing financial sanctions against Mr Lo Hsing Han (Mr Lo), his son Steven Law (also known as Tun Myint Naing), and Law's wife Cecilia Ng, and various companies under their control, for providing support to the military junta currently ruling Burma.

The Treasury says it has identified ten private companies in Singapore held by Cecilia Ng, including Golden Aaron Pte. Ltd (Golden Aaron), which it is sanctioning. The designation freezes any assets which are subject to US jurisdiction and prohibits all commercial transactions by any U.S. person (including US banks) with the designated persons.

According to the US Government:

"In addition to their support for the Burmese regime, Steven Law and Lo Hsing Han have a history of